Anxiety. Fear.

i am so lost.
i wish i had not been born. Every day it just gets worse.
This year was going to be better. It was going sort of okay. Then the 22 earthquake happened and fucked things up, and i am just so scared.

i hate earthquakes.
i know we are all saying that here at the moment, but i don't think they're fearing it the same. Everyone at school and dancing seems to have moved past it. But i'm just so terrified. i get panic/anxiety attacks. i can't sleep.

HERE COMES THE COLD AGAIN I FEEL IT CLOSING IN

And i just can't deal with anything right now and all i want to do is lose myself, and sleep sleep sleep forever and wake up sixteen years ago and start my life again. Or better yet, not at all.